Well, I think we’re still going to end up on the Central California Coast in January. Just about everything is arranged: The contract is signed, our realtor will rent out our Fullerton house and manage it for us, we’ve got a moving company, Case found two airports with available hangar space near our new home (a critical point in selling him on the location), and I’ve already decided how I’m going to arrange our furniture once we arrive.
But now it’s all looking pretty shaky. Politics and the economy are to blame. Actually, mostly politics.
You see, according to Case, we’re leveraged out just as far as Lehman Bros, our balance sheet doesn’t look any better than AIG’s, and our mortgage is about as solvent the ones in Merrill Lynch’s portfolio. Oh, and he says our 13-year-old car is worth about as much as a new GM, and it’s about as reliable. So anyway, based upon these conclusive indications of impending fiscal collapse, he applied to Congress for a bail out. And they refused! Can you believe it? Everyone else is getting one -- why not us?
So he says maybe it’s time to go back on the road. He says there are still a few countries out there that don’t have an extradition treaty with the United States, and it’s time to “liquid-ize our fungible assets” and “relocate our strategic operations to a more favorable environment” (i.e. grab our cash and run for it).
Now, this may surprise you, but I’m actually thinking that sounds pretty good. I’m about as frosted with the government as he is. Until recently, I had everything set up with Blagojevich, and was just laying low until he appointed me to Barak's Senate seat. Then the FBI goes and advertises the deal, and now the price has been bid up way out of my range.
I’m going to ask Case if they speak English in any of those countries. If not, maybe we’ll stay. I can always pawn his plane and buy Hillary’s Senate seat in a couple months. Don’t worry; after I get to Congress, I’ll get Case his bail-out, and he’ll be able to get a better plane. I hear the Big Three CEOs have some jets for sale.
Friday, December 12, 2008
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